Parenting in Public

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There’s a certain kind of exhaustion that comes with parenting. It is the kind that doesn’t go away with a nap or a break.

And when you’re parenting a child with ADHD and ODD and two other children, that exhaustion can feel deeper, heavier… and lonelier.

Holding It Together on Vacation

We just came back from a trip. A memorable vacation time that was meant to be just fun, relaxing, and memory-making sadly did not turn out. And in many ways, it was memorable. But unfortunately, stress from ODD took over.

When you’re managing behaviors, navigating triggers, trying to prevent meltdowns before they unravel, it’s hard to just be present.

I found myself watching other families, noticing their small challenges too, but feeling like ours were just a lot louder. A little more visible. A little more misunderstood.

I cried. Twice.
I had full-on breakdowns, the kind where it feels like the pressure might swallow you whole.
And after each one, I had to emotionally reset to gather myself, breathe deeply, and force a shift. I had to choose to step into the next moment, to try again, to be present with my family and not just the stress.

Because sometimes, surviving is the moment.
And sometimes joy has to be fought for, through all the tears, prayers, and sheer determination.

The Unspoken Struggle

It’s hard to enjoy a vacation when your brain is in constant alert mode. When you’re keeping track of tone, body language, noise levels, sugar intake, how long it’s been since the last stimulation break and how long until the next one might break you.

We love our son so deeply. But some days it feels like we’re barely keeping our heads above water.

We don’t want to be the “downers.”
We don’t want to overshare.
We don’t want to admit how hard this is, especially when we’re with people we love.

So we smile.
We show the good moments.
We say “we’re doing well” even when we’re stretched thin.

Because vulnerability feels heavy. Because we don’t want pity, we want understanding.

Our Little Life, and the Love That Holds It

My husband and I lean on each other more than ever. We love our life. We love our kids.

But there’s grief tucked in with the gratitude.
There’s stress layered over the sweetness.
There are moments of joy, cracked at the edges by exhaustion.

We know having a village matters. But sometimes, that village is small. Sometimes, it’s just the two of us. And we’re learning that even when it’s hard, that’s still enough.

To the Parents Who Get It

If you’re reading this and nodding along…I see you.
If you’re also the one packing sensory tools, backup snacks, weighted blankets, and pep talks before family events…I see you.
If you’ve cried in the car after what was supposed to be a fun day…I see you.

You’re not failing.
You’re loving hard in a world that doesn’t always understand neurodivergence or invisible struggles.
You’re doing your best with what you’ve been given, and that’s more than enough.

Final Thoughts

It’s okay to be honest.
It’s okay to be tired.
It’s okay to love your life and still find it incredibly hard.

We’re walking this road the best we can, together. One trip, one moment, one meltdown, one breakthrough at a time.

FAQ: Parenting in Public: Loving Big, Struggling Quietly

How do you emotionally recover after a parenting breakdown in public?
I give myself space to breathe and reset, even if it means stepping away for a moment. It’s not about bouncing back perfectly — it’s about choosing to try again, even when it’s hard.

What helps during family trips with a child who has ADHD and ODD?
Planning ahead, setting flexible expectations, packing sensory tools and comfort items, and leaning on your support system (even if it’s just your partner) can make a huge difference.

Is it okay to admit you’re struggling as a parent?
Yes — more than okay. Honesty is powerful, and it helps us connect with others who are in the same season. You don’t have to hide your hard days to prove you’re a good parent.

What should friends or family know when traveling with a neurodivergent child?
Understanding and patience go a long way. Sometimes the smallest gestures — a quiet space, a listening ear, or letting go of expectations — make the biggest difference.